Juvenile Thinking

 How does one mature in an immature environment?  My "cloistered brothers" were telling me that they feel sorry and don't know how to help the 18–25-year-olds, in prison.  How can they ever grow up in prison?  After they've served their time and go outside back home, how will they fit in?

Thinking about it, I don't know if they ever will.  They will always be that juvenile delinquent and think like one.  I say that because I had an experience that cements my opinion.  

When I was about 35-years-old, I took a class to obtain a real estate broker's license.  Sitting in the classroom, I found myself "checking" out the guys that entered the room.  After a bit, I stopped myself and asked, "What am I doing?  I am 35 years old, married, and the mother of three children!" 

Why was I thinking like that?  I think it was because the last time, I was in a classroom was when I was in college and would have been "checking out" the guys, as they entered the room.  Even though I was 35, I was thinking like I was 18.  

How in the world, could excons think any differently?  They would just pick up where they left off, before they became incarcerated.

God help them.

Epistle

 One of my "cloistered brothers" asked me if I knew what an "epistle" was.  It's a letter, especially the letters St. Paul wrote from prison.

Nope, he said.

An epistle is the wife of an apostle.

Expectations

 The "cloistered brothers" are reading Simone Weil's Waiting for God. A discussion arose on prayer.  Gordon, does believe in God, but not prayer.  He figures that God is all knowing, so He knows what is going to happen, so what's the use of prayer.  He challenged the group with the question, "So what do you expect to happen?"  

This question has been bouncing back and forth, inside my head.  What do I expect to happen when I pray?  Today is two days removed from the question, and I've come to the conclusion that what I expect and what I hope are two different answers.

I hope that God will do what I want.  I expect that I will understand what God is doing.  I expect that my prayer will give me wisdom and understanding and patience to see God's plans.

I also expect that more understanding will come, in time.  I also expect that I will have an answer for Gordon, that will satisfy him.

Young and Dumb

 All I could think of when I finished reading Pretty Dead Things by Lillian West was the Mattis Law. This is a law in Massachusetts where prisoners who committed their crimes when they were under 21, will have their case reevaluated. 

My heart often broke when I talked to some of my "cloistered brothers," who had committed murder when they were 18 or 19.  They were now in their 50-60s.  They certainly weren't the same kids they were then.  What a waste of life!  They could be useful in society, if given a chance.  

This review of Pretty Dead Things is a big spoiler alert.  Sorry.  This is not really a book review, but rather a critique of the judgement the story places on a 16-year-old.

The story begins with Cora and Elliot planning their wedding.  Cora happened to buy a jar of junk, at an estate style.  The jar contained baubles, i.e., buttons, earrings, pins, marbles, AND two rings--a wedding ring set. 

The story is about Cora tracing the engraved initials in the ring, to its owner.  In doing so, she finds that the owner, Clarity, disappeared one day. Clarity wasn't accepted by the town and led a strange life.  Her husband was married before and left his first wife and daughter for Clarity.  Here I blame the husband.  He was married and should never have allowed himself to become involved with Clarity.  Mind you, he was not only leaving his wife, but he was also leaving his daughter, Beverly.  

The author describes Lewis as a kind, and gentle soul, who would never hurt anyone.  He was a victim of love.  He couldn't help himself falling in love with Clarity.

Bull S###!

He destroyed two people's lives: his wife's and daughter's!

Lewis leaves his family, divorces first wife and marries Clarity (hence the rings).  Lillian West, the author, tries to convince the readers of Lewis' good intentions.  He's a good father to his daughter, Beverly.  Not much is mentioned of how the wife takes it.  How would you?

Clarity and Lewis have a daughter, Hazel.  That makes Beverly and Hazel, sisters.  Life goes on.  Clarity and Lewis are happy.  Not so much Beverly and the scorned first wife.  Beverly loves her father, Lewis, but her mother's tears are upsetting. Beverly's homelife was destroyed by her father's marriage to Clarity.

If only Clarity wasn't in the picture, then Lewis would come back to Beverly's mother and life would go on, as it should have.  This idea stewed in Beverly's mind.

The idea was realized when Beverly was 16.  She took the chance to kill Clarity and buried her body.  And her wish came true.  Lewis remarried Beverly's mother, his first wife, and their life continued as best as it could.

Now Cora find's Clarity's wedding ring.  The search for what happened to the ring's owner results in finding Clarity's skeleton, buried by Beverly.  Beverly is caught and damned.

My question is, should she be?  

If Beverly were in Massachusetts, and had served her life sentence, admirably for 20+ years, her case would be looked at. She might be given the chance to finish her life sentence, outside (not in prison).  This doesn't mean that she was "scott free." Depending on the circumstances, she may have to wear a monitoring bracelet, for the rest of her life.  She can't leave the state.  She can't leave her home without her parole officer's permission.  IOW, she's under house arrest for the rest of her life.  The parole board would decide on the conditions of Beverly's release.  This is the Mattis Law, as I understand it.  

How do you judge Beverly?  At 16, I would become enraged if someone stole by boyfriend, never mind my father!  I hated many girls, for many reasons.  I had many negative opinions that I grew out of.  I looked at life in black and white.  It's only by the grace of God that I never committed murder.  

Of course, Pretty Dead Things, is only fiction.  As I said, I couldn't help but relate the story to a few "cloistered brothers", that I know. The novel it home.  There but for the grace of God, go I.

Tuning

 Today, my "cloistered brothers" were discussing prayer.  What does praying mean to you?  I thought the best answer was a comparison.  Praying is like tuning an instrument.  The instrument is trying to find the correct pitch.  Praying is trying to tune your heart to God. 

Violins Prayers is sensitive instruments communication which relies on the tension of their strings attention to stay in tune focus. It does not take much for this tension to slacken or tighten, such as temperature conditions, or simply through regular, day to day usage routine. Tuning the violin heart is a delicate operation and can be a daunting process if you are unfamiliar with it. If the open strings (G, D, A & E) are your focus is out of tune, this can affect the tuning of the whole instrument prayer and subtly shift the placement of your attention. However, there are lots of different tips and tricks you can use to ensure your prayer life is perfectly in tune and will blend seamlessly with what you want to say from your heart.  

Some people begin by sitting in front of a visual aid, i.e., if you are praying for the health of a loved one.  Look at a picture of your loved one for inspiration.

You might want quiet.

Music sometimes can help.

Rote prayers to get one going, like the Lord's Prayer.

Reading some psalms.

Talk to God like you talk to your best friend.

How do you tune your prayers?

Tripping = Meditating

 When people in prison have a lot of time being alone, they often go tripping.  Inmates do interact with others, but if you are in the SHU or the "hole," you are alone.  SHU is Special Housing Unit.  

The inmates there have a developed a coping mechanism called "tripping."  This is an adjustment coping mechanism.  The person actively imagines trips outside of the prison.  Perhaps it is something from their past, or something they would love to do when or if, they ever get out.

This takes practice, perhaps years.  It starts with pacing, back and forth, because if you are sitting and still, too many distractions will interfere with your trip.

I do this too, in my meditative walks.   Only, I don't have to imagine things and places I'd like to go, because I can.  That's called planning.  Like my "cloistered brothers and sisters," however, I can "trip" by imagining putting myself in Christ's life.  

I've been on the trip the Holy Family went when they fled into Egypt.  Matt 2: 13-15  Who hasn't walked the Via Delarosa?  

This isn't anything new.  Ludolph of Saxony in his commentaries of the Life of Jesus talks of doing this.  Ignatian Contemplation is also, the same.

Original Sin and St. Agustine

 My "cloistered brothers" and I were doing some Lectio Divina on Psalm 51.  We focused in on verse 5.

Surely I was sinful at birth,

    sinful from the time my mother conceived me.

Most of us, I know I was, thinking of the first sin committed by Adam and Eve, called "original sin."  Steve, leading the group, said that wasn't possible to be in David's mind, when he wrote the psalm.  It seems that the term was used and promoted by St. Agustine, much later.  

Original sin is an Augustine Christian doctrine that says that everyone is born sinful. This means that they are born with a built-in urge to do bad things and to disobey God. 

It explains our desire to choose the bad, the wrong choice.  Original sin affects individuals by separating them from God, and bringing dissatisfaction and guilt into their lives.

That's exactly what happened to Adam and Eve.  They were separated from God.  So, I think that affect, separating oneself from God, was there from Adam and Eve, but there was no name to it.  I think everyone just accepted the fact that we are born sinful.  Agustine gave it a name.  

A Lifeline for Prisoners

 What exactly should I pray for when I want to pray for prisoners?

Justice and fairness in the legal system.

Family support and unity.

Protection and safety while incarcerated.

Hope for a better future.

Healing and restoration.

Transformation and a relationship with Jesus.

Peace in times of turmoil.

Wisdom and guidance for both the inmate and their family.

St. Leonard of Noblac (d. 559).
St. Leonard was converted to Christianity at Christmas 496, and went on to serve in the court of Clovis I. As a disciple of St. Remigius, Bishop of Reims, Leonard was granted the prerogative to visit prisons and free anyone held there. He secured the release of a number of prisoners (for whom he has become a patron saint).

Imperfect People

 Today, my "cloistered brothers" and I were discussing  Questioning God,                   and Jeremiah's stuttering was mentioned.  No one recalled anywhere in scripture where that was mentioned.  We looked it up. Isaiah 28: 11:  "For with stammering lips and another tongue will he speak to this people." 

Father Radcliffe, in Questioning God, with Popko Lukas, mentions the stuttering of the poet, David Jones, in A..a...a Deus Domine. In this poem, Jones is looking for God.  He needs God, much like a stutterer needs help.  No one can rely in himself.  We need help and divine help would be best. 

The Jubilee Year

 What is a jubilee?

It's a celebration. It's an old English term (Anglo-French) jubilé  from Latin Jubilaeus, modification of the Greek iōbēlaios, from Hebrew yōbhēl ram's horn.

Of course, Catholicism follows the worship services of the Jews, after all, Jesus was Jewish. Jubilees come from Jewish traditions.  Leviticus 25:9, defines Jubilee as a sabbatical year after seven cycles of seven years--approx. every 50 years.

It was a real celebration, because people were free from bondage--all types.  Debts were forgiven (Leviticus 25: 23-38.  All prisoners (my "cloistered brothers" would be free!), all slaves were released, and all property would be returned to its original owners.  Plus, the land was not worked for a year.  Land and people rested.

I don't know how the Jews celebrate the Jubilee, today.  However, Catholics celebrate a Jubilee, every 25 years.  There is one in 2025.  Traditionally, the pope will open five doors that have been locked since the last Jubilee. The doors will be opened by the pope at the beginning of the jubilee, December 24, 2024 and locked back up on January 6, 2026.  This year, one of the doors to be unlocked will be a prison!  Oh, how I wish, my "cloistered brothers" could be freed, as the original law in Leviticus stated.

Pilgrimages to those churches will be many and local parishes' doors will emulate the tradition. I am sure everything will be carried out, with as much solemnity as is possible.  

Pope Francis before the holy door of St. Peter's Basilica during the convocation of the Jubilee of Mercy, April 11 (photo: L'Osservatore Romano)

ELISE HARRIS/CNA/EWTN NEWS NewsNovember 2, 2015

The Favor

 Funny how you can hear the same story and come to a different realization.  I heard the story of Eduardo Bonnin and the two prison inmates before.  But only yesterday, when one of my “cloistered brothers” told the story of the beginnings of Cursillo, again, was I impressed with "the favor". I tried “googling” but the story I read is nowhere to be found. I am not surprised, since a prison has a prominent place in the beginnings of Cursillo. 

The setting is Spain, 1949.  For many years, Eduardo Bonnin and some friends were trying to bring people to Jesus.  The War in Spain made things difficult.  Bonnin and his friends were laymen.  They wanted to bring others to Christ.  They had retreats to introduce people to Jesus.  They had faith formation.  But nothing seemed to attract people.

Coincidentally, a prison chaplain was trying to minister to two men on death row.  But they wanted nothing to do with the priest.  The chaplain asked a local parish priest if he knew any lay people who would could try to minister to the condemned men.  

This is where Eduardo Bonnin and friends come in. They wanted to help, but how was a big question. This is what they did.

They met the two inmates and asked them for a favor. You may ask, what kind of favor could two men, soon to be executed in hours, do? 

Since they were about to meet God face to face, all too soon, Bonnin asked them to request of God to grant the Cursillo movement special graces to be effective.

You see the result.  It is now 2024 and Cursillo is still going strong.  Prison inmates love it.

The Power of Love

 Yesterday, I blogged about God's omnipotence The One True Faith: God's Omnipotence (theonetruefaith-faith.blogspot.com).  Everybody interprets that attribute as powerful might.  What if we're wrong?  Suppose God is omnipotent in love.  Wouldn't that explain the evil we see in our world?  We ask why God doesn't do something.  

He doesn't "fix" wrongs the way we would.  He accompanies us.  We're supposed to fix.  What about death?  We can't fix that.  But God is there through it all.  He doesn't leave us.  

Today, my "cloistered brothers" discussed "suffering."  We read an article in Suffering in the Christian Life, edited by Richard W. Miller.  Specifically, we focused on Elizabeth A. Dreyer's article, "Suffering in the Christian Life and Experience."  The suffering we talked about is emotional.  Think of the suffering of Judas and Peter, for betraying Jesus.  

Think of the suffering of people who have been fired.  Think of the humiliating emotions of people who have failed--lost their medical license, failed in teaching, been disbarred.  It's suffering.  How about mothers estranged from their children?  How about government agencies taking away your children because you're a bad mother?  

These are examples of suffering where God is with us.  

Will the Real You Stand Up, Please

 Today at a chapter meeting, my "cloistered brothers," were talking about the masks we wear. As children we wear masks to please our parents.  Old children learn to wear different masks: for teachers, for friends, and parents.  Teens especially try on different masks: tough guys, nerds, jocks, goths, etc.

In prison, especially, you had better wear the appropriate masks or you will have a miserable life.  But which is the real you?  Are you a conglomerate of all your masks?  

The lone Franciscan in our group, opined.  St. Francis said, "I am what I am."

The Dominicans jumped in with a laugh and said, Popeye said that.  I y'am what I y'am.  

People Can Change

 Of course, people can change.  Thanks be to God.  I am not the stupid, shy, silly, twenty-something year old, I once was.  Nor, is Damon West, the stupid, arrogant, self-important, jock, he once was.  I'm talking about the book, The Change Agent, by Damon West.

Damon was spoiled.  Success in athletics gave him confidence and a big ego.  He became involved in drugs.  It was cool and fun.  Until it wasn't.

He got sucked in and became a crook.  The usual story that I hear in my prison ministry.  No one thinks that addiction will happen to them.  

No one is immune.

Fortunately, like my "cloistered brothers," Jesus had Damon's back.  Damon knew he had veered off the religious road and worked to get back on it.  He kept on it and continues keeping himself on the straight path.  

I love how his parents never gave up on him.  That's important.  When he was released from prison, his parents picked him up and brought him home.  They had even kept up his driver's license, while he was incarcerated.  That alone, exemplifies hope.  

If you enjoy stories about people who change their lives, The Change Agent, is for you.

Liberation of St. Peter

 

Raphael's Liberation of St. Peter from prison touches me personally.  I always think of my "cloistered brothers", who are Lay Dominicans, living in prison.  

Acts 12:5-11

King James Version

5 Peter therefore was kept in prison: but prayer was made without ceasing of the church unto God for him.

6 And when Herod would have brought him forth, the same night Peter was sleeping between two soldiers, bound with two chains: and the keepers before the door kept the prison.

7 And, behold, the angel of the Lord came upon him, and a light shined in the prison: and he smote Peter on the side, and raised him up, saying, Arise up quickly. And his chains fell off from his hands.

8 And the angel said unto him, Gird thyself, and bind on thy sandals. And so he did. And he saith unto him, Cast thy garment about thee, and follow me.

9 And he went out, and followed him; and wist not that it was true which was done by the angel; but thought he saw a vision.

10 When they were past the first and the second ward, they came unto the iron gate that leadeth unto the city; which opened to them of his own accord: and they went out, and passed on through one street; and forthwith the angel departed from him.

11 And when Peter was come to himself, he said, Now I know of a surety, that the Lord hath sent his angel, and hath delivered me out of the hand of Herod, and from all the expectation of the people of the Jews

God Hates Vegetarians

 This was funny.  Today, the "cloistered brothers" were reading about Cain and Abel, Genesis 4: 1-7.  Cain farmed and Abel shepherded.  For offerings to God, Cain offered fruit and vegetables, whereas, Abel offered the first-borns from his flocks.  God accepted the meat offerings but wasn't thrilled with the fruit and vegetables.  One of the "cloistered brothers" quipped, "because God hates vegetarians."

Of course that's not true.  No one knows why God liked one offering and not the other.  Some people surmise that it was the intentions of the giver. IOW, Abel offered the first-borns and Cain offered old and rejected fruit and vegetables.  Scripture doesn't say exactly.

This led to a discussion of siblings and parenthood.  From the siblings point of view, it wasn't fair.  But we don't know God's reasons.  As parents, sometimes our actions look like we prefer one child more than the other, but the parent may be helping the vulnerable child.  A parent can't help each child equally because each child's needs are different that the others.  

It was an interesting discussion.

Prayer Request

 My "cloistered brothers" are walking around dazed.    "None was there when I had my fatal hour": on the death of Jorge L. Zerquera - Reinventing PeaceReinventing Peace (tufts.edu)

Where is God?

 The discussion with my "cloistered brothers" centered on Timothy Radcliffe's new book, Questioning God.  This is Father Radcliffe's latest book.  It is a discussion between two theologians: Timothy Radcliffe and Lukasz Popko.  Both are Dominican priests.  

We didn't get very far, because we were hung up with our own opinions.  Radcliffe points out that the first words recorded that God speaks in Genesis is "Where are you?"  (Genesis 3: 9)  My brothers laughed at that because we humans are always crying out to God, "Where are You?" Even Jesus asks that very same question, (Mark 15: 34)

We decided that the questions weren't meant to ask for a location, but rather disposition.  Both humans and Jesus on the cross, were asking for a feeling, or assurance, that God was present.  Intellectually, we know that God is omnipresent but it takes a minute or so to have the presence of mind to trust God.

Jesus dying on the cross is the perfect example.  He would have been resurrected, if He didn't die first.  We must trust Him.

Where is God?  He's waiting for us to prove our faith.

Understanding Grows

 Today my "cloistered brothers" were discussing puzzling scripture passages.  We concluded that our understanding grows much like love.

Think about it.  As a child, you loved your parents and friends.  But once you fall in love, as a young adult, that's another dimension.  Then when you have a child, love grows exponentially.  

We figure that understanding grows like love.  When you first read the Bible you have a rudimentary understanding.  As you mature, understanding scripture is different and better since you understand more.

Two Hours Sleep

 For some reason I couldn't sleep, last night.  I think I slept for two hours, that's all.  I started to get sleepy around 7 am, which is time to wake up.  I was just thinking of not going to Chapter, today, and stay home and take a nap, instead. Suddenly, I remembered; it's my turn to lead a program.  

What will I do?  I had forgotten all about it.  I can't bring anything to Chapter.  I didn't have time to tell them what to bring.  What to do?

Now I know why I couldn't sleep.  I had a program to put together in 6 hours.  Take out an hour and a half for Mass.  So I had to think of something in 4 hours.

I decided to use Christian Prayer.  They will have those books. In the back is Office of Reading.  I decided to do a group Lectio Divina with a reading from the back of the Office.

I got ready to go to Mass.  I was extremely surprised to see no one there.  My clock said I was an hour and a half an a half early.  I thought of continuing to drive to a different church but I already had a check written our with my parish' name on it.

I went home but in my driveway I couldn't get my key out of the ignition.  I soon realized that the car has to be in " park" !  Then I couldn't get out of my sear--I still had my seatbelt on.

But everything turned out fine.  My group lectio divina was pretty good.