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Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts

Saturday, October 11, 2025

Scorn to Delight

We all know God turns bad into good.  In this poem, The Jesus Infection by Maxine Kumin, who is an atheist, religion is mocked.  Her underlying prejudice against religion drips through her choice of animals.  She is driving behind trucks carrying animals and views the backside of picks and cows and sees a bumper sticker to "Honk if you love Jesus."  Good thing she honked.  She cooperates with grace.

 I personally clearly identify with "The Jesus Infection". I remember cruising down the highway to the Cape with "Glory and Praise" music blasting from CD 's, the wind whipping my hair and voice around, and loving it. I think of Jesus being born in a stable, with curious farm animals looking in, and breathing right on him.  The animal smell and natural bodily functions creating an odor and sight that Jesus was born in.  This poem wouldn't bother Him, one bit.  After all, He created it all.

The Jesus Infection
by
Maxine Kumin

Jesus is with me
on the Blue Grass Parkway going eastbound.
He is with me
on the Old Harrodsburg Road coming home.
I am listening
to country gospel music
in the borrowed Subaru.
The gas pedal
and the words
leap to the music.
On throw out the lifeline!
Someone is drifting away.

Flags fly up in my mind
without my knowing
where they've been lying furled
and I am happy
living in the sunlight
where Jesus is near.
A man is driving his polled Herefords
across the gleanings of a cornfield
while I am bound for the kingdom of the free.
At the little trestle bridge that has no railing
I see that I won't have to cross Jordan alone.

Signposts every mile exhort me
to Get Right With God
and I move over.
There's a neon message blazing
at the crossroad
catty-corner to the Burger Queen:
Ye Come With Me.
Is it well with my soul, Jesus?
It sounds so easy
to be happy after the sunrise,
to be washed in the crimson flood.

Now I am tailgating
and I read the bumper sticker
on a Ford truck full of Poland Chinas.
It says: Honk If You Know Jesus
and I do it.
My sound blats out for miles
behind the pigsqueal
and it's catching in the front end,
in the axle,
in the universal joint,
this rich contagion.

We are going down the valley on a hairpin turn,
the swine and me, we're breakneck in,
we're leaning on
the everlasting arms.




Saturday, November 28, 2015

Your First Christmas Card

YOUR FIRST CHRISTMAS CARD 
Cleverly done!!!


T'was two months before Christmas
When all through our land,


Not a Christian was praying

Nor taking a stand.

Why the PC Police had taken away
The reason for Christmas - no one could
say.
 
The children were told by their schools not to sing

About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.

It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would
say

December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.


Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, cheques and credit

Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!

CD's from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-Pod

Something was changing, something quite odd!


Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa

In hopes to sell books by Fran-ken & Fonda..

As Targets were hanging their trees upside down
At Lowe's the word Christmas - was nowhere to be found.

At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears
You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.

Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-is-ty

Are words that were used to intimidate me.

Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton,
Wolf Blitzen

On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !

At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter

To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.
 
And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith

Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace

The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded
The reason for the season, stopped before it started.
 
So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'

Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.

Choose your words carefully, choose what you say

Shout "MERRY CHRISTMAS",
not "Happy Holiday "!
 
Please, all Christians join together and
wish everyone you meet


MERRY CHRISTMAS!
 
Christ is The Reason for the Christ-mas Season!

If you agree please forward, if not, simply delete.
Remember we as Christians are to represent what Peace looks like!

Rabbi

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