Our Memorial

 Hubby and I are trying to make it easier for our loved ones, when we die. We are thinking of how to make the bereavement process easier for them.  We are trying to take away the stress, uncertainty, unknown, questions, and family, finance, and decisions, alleviated--at least, as much as we can.

Many years ago, we wrote a will.  Two years ago, we bought a cemetery plot. Last year, we had this engraved memorial stone made.  It depicts one of our favorite memories.  The lighthouse is Nobska Light in Woods Hole, MA.  For over twenty years, we had a sailboat (22 ft. red hull, O'Day).  We loved that boat. To include our favorite memories, we have Hubby and I sitting on a bench, on Nobska Beach, looking at a sailboat.

I love this.  Dare I say, I can't wait to die. 

All Souls Remembrance Program

 What do people do with Jane and John Doe?  I'm talking about unclaimed bodies lying in the city morgue. No one knows who these people are.  Or, like my friend who owns a second hand store and found ashes in a shoe box.  

These are the remains of human beings and as such they should be given a decent burial.  The Archdiocese of Detroit buries them on All Souls Day.  The organization, Catholic Funeral and Cemetery Services offers several mision services to promote the Christian belief of respect for the image of God, which is in all of us.

The program is called Gather Them Home.  I find this comforting, that someone cares.  

No Columbarium

 My grandchildren affirmed a decision hubby and I were discerning.  You see today is All Soul's Day, so I took my grandchildren to the cemetery today to pray for the poor souls.  My grandchildren are half Italian, hence they called their grandfather, Nono.  So we visited Nono's grave.  

I was showing my grandchildren the columbarium.  Hubby and I are deciding whether we want to be cremated or not.  I expressed these thoughts to my grandchildren.  They were upset.  They want us to be buried the traditional way.  

I had no idea they would feel that way.

Gone But Not Forgotten

During the COVID-19 quarantine, I have been walking for exercise.  It may seem strange, but my favorite places to walk are cemeteries.  I find it interesting to walk through the cemeteries in Franklin.

 

 The Union St. cemetery has grave stones from the 1700s.  There are some very recognizable names: 

• ·         Oliver Dean, who founded Dean College
• ·         Fletcher family, there’s a softball field named after the family.
• ·         Ray family, funded Franklin Library -  the first library in the country.

Then there’s the Beaver Street Cemetery.  It is really called St. Mary’s Cemetery because the parishioners of St. Mary’s purchased the land in 1864 because Catholics weren’t allowed to be buried in the Union St. cemetery.  But that was then and this is now.  Now anyone can be buried in either the Union St. or Beaver St. cemetery.  I found it interesting to notice the Irish and Italian names on the St. Mary’s gravestones in contrast to the English names on the Union St. cemetery tombstones. 

Cemeteries hold the history of civilization.  These two cemeteries reflect the mindset of our Puritan ancestors who left England for freedom to practice their own religion and then in turn didn’t practice what they preached.  In St. Mary’s cemetery we see the oldest gravestones engraved with Irish surnames, reflecting the Irish immigrants fleeing the potato famine in the mid-1800s.  Soon overwhelming the Irish names are Italian names.   Names that only Franklinites could pronounce:

• ·         Mucciarone
• ·         Bucchiano
• ·         D’Aniello

St. Mary’s cemetery has a beautiful memorial garden and a columbarium. A columbarium is a wall of vaults containing the cremated remains of the deceased.  It is a peaceful area for respectful reflection. 

               

There’s one more cemetery that is perhaps the most interesting of all, albeit the smallest one.  It is on Green St., Franklin.  The official name is the City Mills Historical Cemetery.  That area is part of the City Mills section of Norfolk/Franklin, hence the name.  Some of the people buried there:

·         Samuel Allen 15 Mar 1778 Franklin, Norfolk, Massachusetts, USA - 14 Jan 1866
Edward Gay Jr 2 Jul 1696 Wrentham, Suffolk, Province of Massachusetts Bay - 28 Feb 1758

·         Timothy Hawes 21 Jul 1722 Wrentham, Suffolk, Province of Massachusetts Bay - 8 Mar 1772

·         Rhoda (Mason) Allen abt 1795 Dedham, Norfolk, Massachusetts, USA - 15 Apr 1862

·         James Shepardson 24 Jul 1789 Wrentham, Norfolk, Massachusetts, United States - 8 Mar 1863 [1]

There are other reasons to enjoy walking in these cemeteries besides historical interest.  There’s the peace and quiet.  The roads are paved so one can wholly concentrate on their reflections.  The epitaphs on the gravestones are interesting and some are funny. (That will be a future story.)  The architecture, material, and choice of design offer imaginative stories about people’s lives.  It certainly makes you wonder what happened between birth date - death date.   Just imagine!  An entire life is represented by a dash! 

Soon many more graves and cremains will be added to our cemeteries, due to the COVID-19 pandemic.  A walk through the cemeteries will put your priorities in order.  What will your legacy be?

---

[1] https://www.wikitree.com/wiki/Category:City_Mills_Historical_Cemetery%2C_Franklin%2C_Massachusetts

What to Do When Visiting a Cemetery

What to Do When Visiting a Cemetery: Here ate some suggestions I've never thought of--especially the last few.  I never heard of The Litany of Holy Souls:





LITANY FOR THE SOULS
IN PURGATORY # 1

Lord, have mercy on us.
Christ, have mercy on us.

Lord, have mercy on us. Christ, hear us.
Christ, graciously hear us.

God the Father of Heaven,
Have mercy on the souls of the faithful departed.

God the Son, Redeemer of the world,
Have mercy on the souls of the faithful departed.

God the Holy Spirit,
Have mercy on the souls of the faithful departed.

Holy Trinity, One God,
Have mercy on the souls of the faithful departed.

Holy Mary,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Holy Mother of God,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Michael,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Gabriel,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy angels and archangels,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint John the Baptist,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Joseph,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy patriarchs and prophets,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Peter,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Paul,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint John,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy apostles and evangelists,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Stephen,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Lawrence,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy martyrs,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Gregory,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Ambrose,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy bishops and confessors,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Mary Magdalen,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

Saint Catherine,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye holy virgins and widows,
Pray for the souls of the faithful departed.

All ye saints of God,
Make intercession for the souls of the faithful departed.

Be merciful, Spare them, O Lord.
Be merciful, Hear them, O Lord.

From all evil,
O Lord, deliver them.

From Thy wrath,
O Lord, deliver them.

From the flame of fire,
O Lord, deliver them.

From the region of the shadow of death,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thine Immaculate Conception,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thy Nativity,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thy Most Holy Name,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through the multitude of Thy tender mercies,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thy most bitter Passion,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thy most Sacred Wounds,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thy most Precious Blood,
O Lord, deliver them.

Through Thine ignominious death, by which Thou hast destroyed our death,
O Lord, deliver them.

We sinners,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

O Thou Who didst absolve the sinner woman
and hear the prayer of the good thief,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

That thou wouldst release our deceased parents,
relations and benefactors
from the bonds of their sins
and the punishment for them,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

That Thou wouldst hasten the day of visiting
Thy faithful detained in the receptacles of sorrow,
and wouldst transport them to the city of eternal peace,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

That Thou wouldst shorten the time of expiation for their sins
and graciously admit them into the holy sanctuary,
into which no unclean thing can enter,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

That through the prayers and alms of Thy Church,
and especially by the inestimable Sacrifice of Thy Holy Altar,
Thou wouldst receive them into the tabernacle of rest
and crown their longing hopes with everlasting fruition, Son of God,
We beseech Thee, hear us.

Lamb of God, Who takest away the sins of the world,
Grant them eternal rest.

Lamb of God, Who takest away the sins of the world,
Grant them eternal rest.

Lamb of God, Who takest away the sins of the world,
Grant them eternal rest.

Christ, hear us.
Christ, graciously hear us.

Lord, have mercy on us.
Christ, have mercy on us.

Lord, have mercy on us.

Pray the "Our Father"

V. And lead us not into temptation,
R. But deliver us from all evil.

Amen.

V. From the gates of Hell,
R. Deliver their souls, O Lord.

V. May they rest in peace.
R. Amen.

V. O Lord, hear my prayer,
R. And let my cry come unto Thee.

Let Us Pray

O God, Creator and Redeemer of all the faithful,
grant to the souls of Thy departed servants
the remission of all their sins,
that through our pious supplications
they may obtain the pardon which they have always desired.
Through Jesus Christ Our Lord.

Amen.

O God, the Giver of pardon
and the Lover of the salvation of men,
we beg Thy clemency on behalf of our brethren,
kinsfolk and benefactors who have departed this life,
that by the intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary
and of all the saints,
Thou wouldst receive them
into the joys of Thine everlasting kingdom.
Through Christ Our Lord.

Amen.

O God, to Whom it belongs always
to have mercy and to spare,
be favorably propitious to the souls of Thy servants
and grant them the remission of all their sins,
that being delivered from the bonds of this mortal life,
they may be admitted to life everlasting.
Through Jesus Christ Our Lord.

Amen.

Morning Walk

Either before daily morning Mass, or after, I've been walking.  This walking has a dual purpose: exercise and prayer.  I pray a rosary while I walk.  It takes about 15 minutes, which I consider perfect.  My favorite route for walking AND praying is a cemetery.

Walking through the cemetery focuses my praying because I pray for certain names on the grave stones.  Sometimes it's for all the oldest dates of death.  Sometimes it's for children.  Sometime's it's for stones so aged with mold and moss covering them that the engravings are illegible.
 
Today I came across a grave with the inscription above.  I know that's a popular saying to put on grave stones.  At least that what's I've always been told.  But I had never personally seen it.  As I read it this morning, it struck me in a humorously reflective way.  What kind of person would put such a verse to perpetually mark their last words?

Was the deceased angry?  Did he think it was funny?  Then again maybe the deceased had no say in the matter; it was the person (not necessarily the deceased) ordering the grave stone.

What are your thoughts?

Flaminio Cemetery

Credit:Catholic News Agency picture which credits  L'Osservatore Romano.

This morning's article in Catholic News Agency, November 3, caught my eye.  It's a picture of Pope Francis walking through an aisle of ... of ... (I don't know)... flowers in boxes.  I read the article to learn what was going on.  The article is by Hannah Brockhaus and titled, Pope Francis at Cemetery: Christ gives us hope -- even in death.  The picture is of Pope Francis walking through a cemetery.

Yes, the aisle the pope is walking through are the graves.  The cemetery is Flaminio Cemetery, also known as Prima Porta Cemetery.  Roads travel right through for daily commuters. There are buildings housing the graves surrounding the roads.  It's a new concept for cemeteries.  What do you think?

I don't know what I think.  Death is part of life, so this arrangement makes death seem very ordinary.  I mean if you commuted to work twice a day through Flaminio, you'd forget that it's a cemetery.  But on second thought, do you want to forget your dead?

Would it be acceptable to post signs?  Caution--grieving people crossing.  Pray!  Slow--respect the dead.

Ashes to Ashes

Someone called in a question to Catholic Answers, on the radio.  The caller wanted to know why Catholics can't have their ashes scattered, after they died.  The response had to do with our bodies being temples of the Holy Spirit and as such should be treated with respect.

I wasn't satisfied with that answer.  I would say that the church desires our cremains to be buried in sacred ground.  The human body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and as such, should be treated with as much respect as possible.  To ensure that the cremains are respected, they should be placed in designated holy areas where people come to pray, places that have been consecrated, like a cemetery.

Scattering ashes in the ocean goes ???????????  Placing ashes in favorite places doesn't ensure respectful treatment.

I'd say Mother Church knows best.

Erecting a New Sign

Personalize a photo slideshow

A couple of months ago, I posted about the cleanup we did at Potter Field.  That's the prison cemetery.  We noticed that the sign to cemetery had rotted away.  We took it home with us.  Nyghia Nye made a new one.  This morning we took Nyghia's sign back to the cemetery and put it up.  This smilebox chronicles our endeavors.  Actually, Nyghia did all the work.  We offered encouragement. 

As we surveyed the cemetery, before we departed, we all saw a yellow butterfly flutter above the graves.  How's that for a sign from God blessing the cemetery?

Memorial Day

It rained on the Memorial Day parade, so we didn't attend.  It's not the same, anymore, anyway.  When I was a child, the family went to two parades.  The first was my home town's and we went and visited my relatives in the Protestant cemetery.  The only one in town and really everybody could be buried there.  Then in the afternoon, we went to the parade in the neighboring town.  And we visited my relatives there.  More relatives were in this cemetery--the Catholic one.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, no one in my immediate family is buried in my current local cemetery.  My adult kids have never visited a cemetery and planted flowers on graves.  We have never had the opportunity.  We live too distant from family.   That's the way it is.

Praying for the Dead

While hiking this afternoon, we came upon this interesting cemetery.  Hubby and I walked around and read these old tombstones.  At first I was puzzled by the war some of these veteran graves marked.  The Ray War was noted on a few tombstones.  They were the oldest in the cemetery.  Then one of the grave markings was clearer than the others.  It didn't say Ray War.  It said Rev. War.

OH!

Revolution 

Yes, we prayed for them all.

Into your hands, Lord, I commend their spirits.
Into your hands, Lord, I commend their spirits.

You have redeemed us, Lord God of truth.
I commend their spirits.

Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
Into your hands, Lord, I commend their spirits.

Your word has been fulfilled.

When I Die...

What do you think?  All the grave stone says is "I'm with him," with an arrow to her husband's grave.  Doesn't it make you smile?

I'm thinking of doing that.  Of course that's contingent upon my dying after my husband.  But I would put my name, and birth, and death dates, on the other side.  And maybe that will be done, yet.  Notice that Peggy's grave has just been dug.

BTW, these graves are near the Eisenhower home in Fort Adams State Park, in Newport, RI.  The cemetery is St. Joseph's cemetery, but it is known locally as the Barney Street Cemetery.  Note the Irish flags.  Most of the work to build Fort Adams was done by the Irish/Americans.  Just ask the Dugan's.