Finding God

Journaling is a way to find God.  It's a personal diary.  You write a letter to God.  Sometimes you rant.  Sometimes you thank.  Sometimes you ask.  Sometimes you make promises.  

Best part: sometimes you tell God your secrets.

Christ Walking on Water

 The grands and I were discussing the time Peter tried to walk on water. I read them the story from Mark 14:22 using the name of the Apostle Paul, instead of Peter.

They like to listen to stories that have mistakes in them.  I couldn't fool them.  They immediately jumped on the mistake.  Paul is after Jesus has died and resurrected, so he could be the one in this story.

The Start

 My friend, Jordi, is writing seriously, now.  He's quit his day job and is writing as much as he can.  He kept giving me excerpts, so I've read his first issue in his Julian Bacardi Files, piece meal.  It kind of spoiled the plot.  What I mean is, I've read his first book, A Lover's Trick: The Julian Bacardi Files, Book 1: Sofia Greco, piece meal.

I think I want to invite him to my book club, to speak, but of course, they have to have read his book.  The story is excellent, except...except...well, he has quite a bit of sexual erotica in it.  Reflecting in the whole story, it's kind of necessary.  The plot would not be as good, without it. There is no way, you could take it out, and have as good a story.

The idea is that he's a Dominican priest, whose ministry is working with the drug addicts, and dealers, prostitutes, etc.  His deacon is incomprehensibly murdered.  I say it was hard to understand how the good deacon, newly a father, could have ever been involved with prostitutes.  Trying to figure out the why, involves Padre Juli deeply into a prostitution ring. The good Dominican friar is trapped.  He comes out a bad Dominican, in that he breaks his vows of celibacy. 

Reflecting again, how could a Dominican friar ever work undercover in a drug, arms, prostitution ring?  It isn't possible.  Dominican friars live a half-cloistered life.  He has the Divine Office to pray in choir, he has a daily Mass to celebrate, he has to obey his prior, who would never allow one of his friars, the freedom Padre Juli has.  He has to be a bad priest and in the end of the book, Juli is leaving the religious life and priesthood.

Good.  Now, we have more books coming. 

Padre Juli becomes Detective Julian Bacardi.

Eunice

 Sunday, I was waiting with a group of people, to take the elevator.  We were in the main part of the church, waiting for the elevator to go to the ground floor.  A black lady, I never saw in church before, asked, "Where is the 'Wall?'"

A few of us asked, "The what?"

She repeated, "Where is the 'Wall?'"

We didn't know, until she held up the bulletin and pointed to 'Sacred Heart Hall."

"O-o-o-o-o-h.  Hall."  Actually, she was saying 'Hall.'  It's just no one uses that term for downstairs.

Since, I was going downstairs, anyway, and had the time, I took her to the Hall and showed her around the church.  Her name was Eunice and she comes from Zimbabwe. I gave her a ride home.  She walks to daily Mass and she lived about an hour's walk away.

We exchanged phone numbers and I intend to take her under my wing.  She actually told me that she's been here two years and hasn't made any friends!  No one in church has welcomed her.  

Well, no longer, Eunice.  She's under my wing, now.

 

Credo Ut Intelligam

 Bear with me.  I have a simple mind and Aquinas, Augustin, and Anselm will probably spin in their graves, but here is how I see it and I call it like it is.

What am I talking about?

Faith.

Look at a light switch.  You believe that when you flip it on, electricity will light up the room.  Try it so that you will understand where I am coming from.

See what I'm saying?  You believed to understand and after you tried it, you understand and now believe.

Bibliotherapy

 Today I was reading about mental health counselors giving their patients books to read to help them heal. I suppose the books had to be specifically chosen to help, otherwise...  Good grief, can you imagine!

Anyway, my first spiritual director and I used to read books together and discuss them.  I loved it and have been looking for someone to do the same, ever since then.  

He also said that the Holy Spirit is the best Spiritual Director and the H.S. has led me to good friends who are readers.  We help each other.

God is good.

The Sheep's Gate

 Whenever I would read John 10: 7, where Jesus says that He is the gate for the sheep, I would picture a pasture with split rail fences.  When it came time to bring the sheep home, I imagined the sheep were corralled into the fence.  Then the gate was latched to keep them penned up and keep them straying into predator's mouths.

This morning, I learned that sheep could be penned anywhere, at night, e.i., caves, walls, behind stones, etc.  The shepherd stayed present all night guarding them.  For example, if the sheep were put in a cave, the shepherd slept across the opening.  He, himself, acted as a gate.

So you should feel safe, now, with Jesus being the gate.

Nero Wannabe

 This book is well named.  Macabre Trophies by Declan Rush is a dark thriller.  It is about a deranged person who named himself Nero.  The reader won't know who Nero is, until the end.  You guess during the entire story.

I received this book as a gift.  I liked it right away because the setting is my area of Cape Cod.  There's Boston references, too.  I knew everything the characters talked about.  That made me enjoy the story, all the more.

The tale begins with Nero's childhood.  Nero came from mentally damaged people, which is why he was such a sicko.  He killed people and played his violin.  Somehow, he received sexual pleasure from his gruesome deeds.  He kept the eyes of certain people, so that when they died, they wouldn't see God.  (I told you he was mentally sick!)  He kept the eyes in jars.  

The crimes are solved by a new reporter, who had just changed jobs.  He was a bartender and wanted a career change.  Meet J.T. O'Rourke.  Besides a new job, he wanted a new neighborhood, so he moved from Boston to Cape Cod.  He also wanted to acquire a new girlfriend, Echo.  Echo is a townie and knows everyone.  She's the newspaper's photographer.  

The author graphically describes his murders.  Sometimes, it's just too much.  Because of the macabre details, I wouldn't recommend this book for everyone. You won't sleep.

The Bestest

 This is a portrait of Carl Sandburg.  The artist is A. Smith.  I was reading his poetry.  Sandburg can be anything: serious, funny, formal, free wheeling and even song.  I was in the mood for humor, today.

The best preacher is the heart,
      say the Jews of faith.
The best teacher is time.
The best book is the world.
The best friend is God.
      WE, THE PEOPLE.
Carl Sandburg

Our Father, Again

 Four days ago, I posted about The Lord's Prayer.  Today, I read in Aleteia, that Philip Kosloski is just as much gobstruck as I am, by the thought of the number of people, kinds of people, nationalities, from way back when, 33 AD, that have prayed the very same prayer that I am praying now.  

Catholicity

 You know why I like going to shrines, rather than my parish church.  It's because of the variety of people that go there.  Last night I went to a candlelight procession to pray to Our Lady of Fatima.  

In short, in Fatima, Portugal, The Blessed Mother appeared to three children on the 13th of the month, for six months.  The children never veered from their story, in spite of punishments, threats, and deprivations.  And these are young children, who one would think would obey and/or be easily frightened.  

They never changed their story.

I went to a candlelight procession at a nearby shrine.  The candles were wasted because we didn't need them; there was too much daylight.  But it's the faith of the people that carried the procession.

On Sunday, you see people in church, probably because it's Sunday and they feel they're obligated.  But last night, a beautiful evening, no one would have gone to Mass, unless you wanted to go to Mass.  These people are true believers.  Plus, I heard praying in Arabic, Russian, Haitian Creole, French, Indonesian and dialects in Indonesian, Filipino, Italian, Indian, and I can't remember what else.  It brought to mind how universal the Roman Catholic Church is.  Yet, we are One.  Praise be God, the Almighty.  Amen.

Mother's Day

 For some reason, I'm sad today.  My prayer partner prayed for his sister who is estranged from her children.  IOW, she spent Mother's Day, alone.

A gray old woman sits all alone,
Unloved, uncherished, and unknown.
Sitting beside her broken door,
Dreaming of days passed long ago,
When children played about her knee
Filling the air with childish glee,
Tended by her with loving care,
Knowing the blessing of a Mother's prayer.
But now they have gone, each to his life.
A girl to her husband, a boy to his wife,
Forgetful are they of her who sits here,
Silently wiping a tricking tear.
For striving for things in a life so brief
Blind their poor eyes to a dear Mother's grief.
But does she upbraid them in word or in mind.
Nor does their neglect to her seem unkind.
She'll forgive and forget all unkindness they've shown
This poor old mother who sits alone.

Ruby Latimer Edwards. "The Forgotten Mother." Family Friend Poems, November 11, 2006. https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/the-forgotten-mother

Our Father

 It just occurred to me that Jesus taught His apostles the Lord's Prayer.  And that means that they prayed this very same prayer that we pray, until they were martyred. Take it further, St. Augustine prayed it.  St. Dominic prayed it.  Yes, I know everyone prays it.  Even people in Alcoholics Anonymous.

I didn't know people could be so united under Our Father...

Brief Bio

 The parish is having a "parish council election."  Yours truly has been nominated.  I'm trying to write a short bio.  What do you think?

I may look familiar because I was a lector until COVID.  Since I taught religious education for over 20 years, I may have had you in one of my classes. Maybe you participated in the Arise Spiritual Renewal Program, I coordinated for 3 years.

I've been around the parish for 40 years, including being on the parish council 3 times, serving under pastors, Father David Callahan and Father Brian Manning.  God willing, I will serve under Father Bob Poitras.

As a Lay Dominican, I answer God's call.

Birthdays

 Two birthday parties mentioned in the Bible are one by an Egyptian Pharaoh and Herod.  The Pharaoh doesn't have a name but he threw himself a party in Genesis 40: 20-22.

The other birthday party is the one Herod had.  He got very drunk and promised his step daughter anything she wanted, because he so appreciated her dancing for him.  Unfortunately, she wanted the head of John the Baptist.  Matthew 14:6

Here is a birthday party for my husband, when he turned 80.  

The Last Believers

 The Women by Kristin Hannah is a wonderful story about a woman’s experience working as a nurse during the Vietnam War. It’s heart wrenching, and impactful.  It brought back memories.  The Vietnam War was during my young adult years.  My classmates, friends, and their brothers were drafted to fight a war in a country they couldn’t even find on a map.  Too many died there.  An entire generation was impacted.

  

The story is about Frances McGrath.  She lived a privileged life on Coronado Island, California. She was the California girl, the Beach Boys sang about. She was perpetually tanned, long blonde hair, and a surfer girl.  Her family lived within walking distance to the beach.  Her father was  a conservative who expected his son to be a hero soldier and his daughter to marry and produce grandchildren. Her father’s study, had a “heroes’ wall” where the men in the family served proudly.  Her mother was loving and popular at the country club.

When Frances’ brother, Finley, became a navy pilot, Frances conceived the idea of following him.  She had just graduated from nursing school. She didn’t tell anyone, she thought she’d surprise everyone; they’d be so proud.  

Only they weren’t.  They were appalled.  Young ladies don’t go to war.  What could she do?  She was committed.  She had joined the Army because they would take her immediately–only two weeks of training.  Her parents were angry and barely said goodbye.

Then the family received that dreaded visit from two uniform officers, telling them that Finley’s plane was blown out of the sky.   There was nothing left of his body.  They were told to put a stranger’s boots in the casket and bury that.

With her grief, and confused emotions in turmoil, Frances arrives in Vietnam.  She only had two weeks training, where she learned to roll bandages. Luckily, two veteran nurses, Barb and Ethel take the rookie Frances, under their wings.  She was completely unprepared to be a combat nurse.  The three women become fast friends,soul mates,and sisters.

Frances starts in a ward where the soldiers were unconscious.  But there is where she became acclimated to Vietnam.  She eventually becomes a surgical nurse, working with Dr. Jamie Callahan.  They become very close, but on his way home, his helicopter is shot down and he is killed.

There are many horrors.  One of the worse was the realization of seeing all these teenagers dying, wounded, crippled, blinded, and then reading in the newspaper, “The Stars and Stripes”, that the US was winning the war.  Clearly, they weren’t. 

The nurses also treated the Vietnam citizens.  The description of people suffering from napalm was abhorrent. -

I cried reading about the mother with her infant in her arms, fused together when napalm had been poured down on them.

It was clear that our government was misleading the public.  The soldiers in Vietnam couldn’t believe what was happening.  It was a stupid war.  We shouldn’t have been there, in the first place.  Make peace and leave, but Nixon pushed on, even into another country, Cambodia.  The world was crazy.  The soldiers’ fathers had been proud to serve in WWII and Korea.  What happened?  Presidents and leaders assassinated, protests, police brutality and war.  Misleading the public is too soft a description.  The United States government was lying to its people and killing a generation of its own.

There is romance in the story.  She falls in love with a navy pilot, Ryeson, but he is also killed just before returning home.  BTW, the life expectancy of a helicopter pilot was 30 days.

Frankie finally goes home to a different kind of war.  Her friends and neighbors don’t welcome.  Her parents are embarrassed by her.  She finds a job as a nurse, but has to start by emptying bed pans–she who was a surgical combat nurse!  Yes, she had a problem adjusting to this different reality, especially, when Ryeson appears again.  Apparently, he didn’t die; he was captured and held in a prison camp.  But their reunion wasn’t.  I’ll leave it at that.

Eventually, she has a mental breakdown, but with the support of her friends, Barb and Ethel, Frankie puts back her life.  She reconciles with her parents, even becomes a nurse again, but more importantly, she moves on.

 If you were alive during the Vietnam era, you will easily relate and live through the times, again. The Women by Kristin Hannah is an extraordinary novel about a woman’s experience working as a nurse during the Vietnam War. It’s heart wrenching, impactful, moving and fantastic.

A Name By Any Other Name

 What is the most frequently used name for Jesus?

Give up?

It is Son of Man.  Here are some more names:

Advocate - 1 John 2:1
Alpha and Omega - Rev. 1:8, 22:13
Bridegroom - John 3:29
Chief Shepherd - 1 Peter 5:4
Chosen One - Luke 23:35
Eldest of many brothers - Romans 8:29
The First and the Last - Rev. 1:17, 2:29
First born of all creation - Colossians 1:15
Glory - John 12:41
Greater Covenant - Hebrews 7:22
Head of every man - 1 Cor. 11:3
Hidden Manna - Rev. 2:17
Hope - 1 Tim 1:2
Image of the Unseen God - Col. 1:15
Inexpressible - 2 Cor. 9:15
Israel's Comforting - Luke 2:25
God of Glory - Acts 7:2
King of Kings - Rev. 17:14, 1 Tim. 6:15
Lamb Without Spot or Stain - 1 Peter 1:19
Last Adam - 1 Cor. 15:45
Light of the World - John 8:12
Lion of the Tribe of Juda - Rev. 5:5
Living Bread - John 6:51
Lord of All Men - Acts 10:36
Main Cornerstone - Eph. 2:20
Man - John 19:5
Morning Star - 2 Peter 1:19, Rev. 2:28
Only Son of the Father - John 1:14
Perfect Copy - Hebrews 1:3
Power for Salvation - Luke 1:69
Precious Cornerstone - 1 Peter 2:6
Prince of Life - Acts 3:15
Radiant Light - Hebrews1:3
Righteous Judge - 2 Tim. 6:15
Rising Sun - Luke 1:78
Ruler of All - 1 Tim. 6:15
Second Adam - Romans 5:12-21
Son of the Blessed One - Mark 14:61
Spiritual Rock - 1 Cor 10:4
True Vine - John 15:1
The Way - John 14:6
Word Made Flesh - John 1:14

Trust

 Time has been flying by me.  I'm riding high with all my favorite sports teams winning.  However, this cartoon has made me skid to a halt.  It's a famous scenario.  The Charles Schultz cartoon of Lucy holding the football for Charlie Brown.  Charlie runs to kick the ball and just at the last moment, Lucy jerks the football away, and Charlie falls on his butt.  All.  The.  Time!

It just so happens that I have a granddaughter named Lucy.  People are always comparing the cartoon Lucy to my granddaughter.  It's funny.  I did copy this picture and gave it to both granddaughters to paste it into their Bibles.  I was thinking it would be a good reminder to not trust people, but rather, trust God alone.

Think again.  Granddaughters said that you can't trust God because we don't think like God does.  Well, duh!  

What our reality is, is only what we see.  God sees before our reality AND what happens after.  

Think of God's promise to Abraham.  Abraham was supposed to have so many children that he wouldn't be able to count them.  Did he?  No--yet he did.  Abraham's reality v. God's.

Look at Hebrews 11: 39-40.  "Yet, all these, though approved because of their faith, did not receive what had been promised.  God had foreseen something better for us, so that without us they should not be made perfect."  The heroes of the Old Testament died before seeing Jesus.

That's exactly what the "grands" were referring to.  Charlie Brown may never kick that ball, because God has something better for him.  How is Charlie to know?  The reality is, Charlie is always fooled.  

Actually, think again.  Why can't Lucy, when in a magnanimous mood, let Charlie kick the ball?  It's possible.  It's certainly possible.  She might.  Hence, Charlie keeps trying.

Kicking the football was never the point.  It was only a game between the two friends.  She moved; he moved.  Later in the comic strip, Charlie becomes very ill and Lucy regrets never letting Charlie kick the football.  When Charlie gets better, Lucy is going to let him kick the ball.  But Charlie misses the ball and kicks Lucy's arm and breaks it!

(Sometimes, I believe in Karma.)

It's only a comic strip.  God isn't a joke.  It's safe to trust in Him.  He always keeps His promises.  Have patience.  Discern.  Your reality is not God's.  Trust.

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