A Remote for My Husband

If I could find that remote to control my husband, I could redirect his thought process.

If I could find it:
--not in the chair cushions
--not fallen under the table
--not left on top of the TV
--not under the newspapers

If I could only remember
where that remote is hiding:
--am I getting hot
--am I getting cold

If I could just retrieve that lost remote:
--I could have hubby do the looking
--I could have him bring it to me
--I could have him wait on me

Now I know why I can't find the remote!