Spiritual Direction

Fr. Ted and I were talking about retreats and spiritual direction, in the sacristry, tonight. We both like Cistercian retreats. We like the contempletive atmosphere and the nuns and monks. We laughed because we're both going on retreat at the same time, but Fr. Ted is going to the nuns at Mt. St. Mary's Abby and I'm going to the monks at St. Joseph's Abby.

I told Fr. Ted about my Spiritual Director, Fr. Aquinas, who is now at St. Joseph's Abby. I hooked up with Fr. Aquinas via the nuns. I was looking for one of the sisters to be my spiritual director, and Fr. Aquinas offered his services. AQ said that he would make a better SD than any of the nuns because men complement women and vice versa. IOW, women should be spiritual directors to men, and men should be spiritual directors to women. God created us that way--to complement each other.

Fr. Ted agreed.

I, however, am not so sure. I just think that women are naturally better spiritual directors. As Margaret Guenther says in Holy Listening, the Art of Spiritual Direction, "spiritual direction is a ministry of compassionate presence." Women tend to be more compassionate and nurturing.

I've only had one woman spiritual director, and she was the best one I've ever had. All the others I've had are priests. And, except for my first bizarre experience, spiritual direction gradually succumbed to be a nice comfortable chat with Father.