Mothers and Daughters

 For the first time in my long life, beauty has brought me to tears.  It wasn't this picture, per se, it was simply a beautiful action--an image of a little girl proudly showing her mother her work of art.  You see my daughter is a doctor and on certain days, she works late--eight o'clock, or more.  Last night was one of those nights.  My granddaughter's school had an "Arts Night," which included pictures and a tech scan book, and a little concert.  My daughter, although she worked late, managed to just make the end of the concert.  What touched my heart was a little girl skipping ahead of her mother, pulling her hand, to bring her to her art work.

This is the same little girl who was so mad at her mom, she was going to run away from home.  Here she is proudly leading her mother to show off what she had made.

How do I draw a little girl leading her mom down the hall?
How do I verbally describe my heart following after them?

I can't.

Communal Worship

 Sometimes people say they don't need church because they can pray on their own.  True.  But those people are missing out on others praying for their intentions, their loved ones--living & dead, needs, they never thought of but should have.

Orally praying with others is uplifting.  Praying in a group is self-affirming.  Together praying feels like everyone is one heart, like their voices are one.  Their strength in unity.  

CCC 2763

 All Christians know the Lord's Prayer, or sometimes called, The Our Father.  But I bet you didn't know that the prayer is arranged in the sequence that prioritizes our needs. The prayer not only teaches us to ask for things, but also in what order we should desire them.  

Still Missing Chris

My best friend, soulmate, and late night bon-vivant, Christine, died in October of 2022.  At that time, I couldn't really understand the scriptural reading, at her funeral Mass. 

"Death where is your sting?" This is from Paul's letter to the Corinthians 15:55.  "Death where is your sting?"  "Are you serious?" I thought.  The sting is in my heart, in the tears in my eyes, and in the lump in my throat blocking my speech. "Death where is your sting?"  "Didn't you feel it, Paul?"

(sigh)

Of course, I'm not that obtuse to know that Paul was referring to the resurrection and not thinking of the physical death of a dear one. Now that I think of it, Paul wasn't there, when Jesus died.  No wonder he could so blithely ask, "Death where is your sting?" 

(sigh)

Again. I'm thinking of a dear one whom I once physically touched, hugged, kissed, and laughed with, and Paul is preaching the Resurrection. The physical world versus the abstract theological world.  It's good thing we humans have both, or we'd be wallowing only in the physical with no hope for anything better.

S-o--r-r-y.  I'm doodling.

I was talking about my friend, Chris, who although she has been gone, for going on three years, I still am reminded of her when I have a spinach artichoke appetizer, a strawberry marguerita--salted, or I see a mutual friend.  I still miss her because I still love her.  Love still lives. 

When she first became sick almost 20 years ago, and she had been gone for a while.  I wrote this poem:

Missing Chris

Happy is he who find a friend and he who speaks to attentive ears. Sirach 25:9

My soul mate, Chris would help with my mess,

over spinach artichoke dip, nachos,

ice tea, girl-talk, dope slaps, and laughter;

deftly would your perspective fix my problem;

snap smooth wrinkled excuses and cobwebbed thoughts,

as we share late night secrets and pray for grace.

 But she became well, not completely healed, but well enough for us to hang out together, again.  She was a football fan.  Living a town away from Gilette Stadium, she cheered for the New England Patriots.  Tom Brady, the quarter back was an obsession.  If she couldn't get to a game, she went to a sports bar right in Gillette Stadium and in that charged atmosphere she watched her team play on the big TVs.  She would have loved the movie '80 for Brady.  This movie is about four octogenarians who love the Pats and Tom Brady just like Chris did.

Myself, not being a fan of elderly ladies talking dirty and acting sexy, I would never have even entertained the thought of seeing the move, '80 for Brady.

Now, if you don't believe in heavenly intervention, then listen up.  The Senior Center had a raffle to go see the movie.  I thought to myself, "OK Chris, if I win, I'll go for you."  

I won a ticket to go. 

I had the best time.  It was "wicked awesome!" Thus, I was inspired to write another poem for Chris: 

Cheering for Chris

My friend, Chris, who loved the Patriots,

       would have wanted to see “80 for Brady.”

And so I went for Chris, to see, to laugh, and maybe

       to lessen the feel of my grief laden cross.

Chris would have howled with laughter,

      and so I watched for the two of us.

Cheering, clapping, enjoying, plus

      thinking of your happiness ever after.

So now is the sting gone?  Depends. When I need a confidant, I feel

 the sting. But when I have a 

spinach artichoke dip, or a margarita, I smile and send love up to 

Chris because love still lives.  Now, another poem is composed: 

Still Missing Chris

Twice this morning I went to text you

about a thought or two, I knew

you would enjoy.  But then.....

Then my mind halted

and I erased my words.

Of course, I know it's necessary to have an ending before you can have a beginning.

But love doesn't end.

That's proof of God, you'd say.

Life goes on for both of us.  Mine is here and yours is there.

But Chris, I can't text you there.

Sure, you can.  No words are necessary

when you speak from your heart.

I finally get it, Paul.  Love doesn't end with death.   Death doesn't win.  Love conquers all.  "Oh Death, where is your sting."

The Rock that Changed Everything

 For over ten years, (not hyperbole) I've seen this book, on the top shelf.  I always passed it by, barely dusting it.  Acts of Faith, the title, is quite bold.  That's what made me pass it by.  The noun, "Faith", blaring so bright.

I thought it was a theology book.  It was probably a religious textbook.  I ignored it.

Until the day I decided to weed my books.  Acts of Faith was written by Erich Segal. Erich Segal wrote Love Story.  That Erich Segal!!!  Acts of Faith is a novel!

All these years have gone by, and I could have enjoyed a good Erich Segal story.  This particular story intertwines the lives of 3 people who grew up in New York.  The reader gets involved and even though he kind of highly suspects the way the story is going, he rapidly turns each page.  Danny and Deborah are brother and sister.  Their father is a famous Jewish Orthodox rabbi.  Danny is the heir apparent.  Deborah is to be married when she turns 18.  Both buck the system.

Tim Hogan is an orphan.  He is brought up by relatives who never read Dr. Spock.  Tim had it rough.  In fact, he was a bully, even beating up Danny. However, the day he threw a rock through the rabbi's window changed everything. To pay for the damage, Danny becomes the Shabbat Goy.  He lights the lamps for Shabbat.  Doing that job, Danny learns Yiddish, and more importantly, meets Deborah.

Since he is Catholic, and she is Jewish, there is no way they can be a couple.  They move on.  More or less.  Sometimes more.  More often less.  He becomes a priest.  Deborah moves to Israel and when she's 18, she moves to a kibbutz.  

Meanwhile, Danny tries to survive the pressure to take over the family ministry.  He and Tim become good friends, but their lives take them on different journeys.  

How these three become involved, and grow together, is the story.  Besides the passion, religious politics, and religion, the reader actually learns about the Jewish and Catholic faiths.  In fact, I finally understand why Catholic priests can't marry.  (I'm sure Erich Segal intended to prove the opposite.) Tim Hogan advances to become a bishop in Brazil.  Segal in describing the ceremonial rite states, "Such was the silence in the massive basilica that His Holiness could be heard to whisper, "L'anello." He then said quietly in Latin. "Your hand." Tim complied and stretched forth his wedding finger as the Holy Father pronounced in solemn tones, "Take this ring, the seal of your fidelity. With faith and love protect the bride of God, His holy Church."

This exchange dope slapped me.  Don't we say the same vows in our marriage ceremonies?  The words spoken during the ring exchange are very significant.  They express love, fidelity, and commitment.  

Take this ring as a symbol of my love and commitment to you, and as a reminder that I will always be by your side, no matter what life brings.”

I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and devotion to you. I promise to stand by your side, to support and encourage you, and to cherish you for all the days of my life.”

WOWZA! The priest is marrying the church.  The church is the bride; hence, her partner must be male.  The church has always been called the bride of Christ.  The priest marries the church and vows to "love and protect the bride of God, His holy Church."

How do you like that?  I learned.  I understand.  Finally.  Oh, and it was a good story, too.  

Poets Have No Authority

 Poets have no authority.  They don't.  Well, their readers kind of give them authority, in that what they have read touches them.  Sometimes, that's more important than scientific facts.

I think that's why I like the Psalms so much.  Prayers, too!  Psalms and prayers from the devoted believers are from the heart. They are true to some.  They are understood by some.  They suggest to all.

BTW, the picture below is Jesus praying for us.  It is His last prayer at the Last Supper, before He goes out to be arrested.  John 17: 20-26

             Jesus Prayed for You – John 17:20-26 | Steve's Bible Meditations

Playing the Race Card

One reason I'll never get a tattoo is because I get sick of the "same ole thing," and want to change.  I was born with dark brown hair--so dark it looked black.  As an adult, I colored it blonde.  I got sick of that and had my hair "frosted."  Then I tried streaked with blonde.  Finally, after suffering from alopecia, I have left it "au naturel."  It's time, after all.  Old people have white hair. Then, there was a time I had double ear piercings.  I got tired of that look, and now I have only single earrings, if I wear any at all.

My point is that I keep changing my mind.  I'd want to change my tattoos, I'm sure.  Besides, I've always wanted to be what I am not, i.e., blonde, skinny, shorter, thicker lips, bigger eyes, etc.  So, I perfectly understand how Belle Da Costa Greene wanted to be white; even more so, in her time period.  You do what you have to do.

The Personal Librarian by Marie Benedict and Victoria Christopher Murray is about a lady pretending to be white, when she was not.  She pulled it off.  She would not have the job she had, were she not white.  

 This is a story about Belle Da Costa Greene and how she became J. P. Morgan's personal librarian.  He was trying to establish his library to be a respected institution with rare museum quality books, manuscripts, art, etc.  After J. P. Morgan died, she continued on in her job and became the first director of the Morgan library.

The book highlights how unique she was in this man's world.  Often, at auctions, she'd be the only female.  She was very fashionable and often accompanied J. P. Morgan to social events.  She frequently was mentioned in newspapers and magazines.  An extraordinary lady and story.

“Fifty Thousand Dollars for that Book!” The World (New York, NY), May 21, 1911, World Magazine Sunday supplement, p. 1.

Library of Congress Blog: Belle de Costa Greene: Library Director, Advocate, and Rare Books Expert. | Headlines & Heroes    

Religious Vocabulary

 Amazing Grace: A Vocabulary of Faith by Kathleen Norris, has been my daily spiritual reading for a few months.  I assigned myself a chapter a day.  Maybe a couple of chapters because a chapter could have been one paragraph or half a page.  At most, a long chapter was about four pages; just perfect for me.

Norris begins by explaining her pious childhood and then her adolescent rebelling.  As an adult, she tried to figure out why she had abandoned her families' religious sensibility.  She decided that it must have been the vocabulary.  The church vocabulary was off-putting in the secular world she was living. Hence, this book is examining churchy vocabulary:

eschatology

antichrist

salvation

repentance

blood

etc.

There are eighty words: one for each chapter. There are some that finally made sense to me.  She is not Catholic, yet she is a Benedictine oblate.  So, she is literate in Catholic sensibilities.  She has preached and taught, in various venues.  She is always courteous to everyone's different spiritualities.  Her own experiences described in her casual writing style make the reader feel like talking to a friend.  That she has become. 

Dear Lord and Father of mankind Hymn - Westminster Abbey (with lyrics)

When I was a child, the family usually went to the beach on summer weekends.  Driving Route 110, we passed a house in Haverhill that had a sign that read it was the birthplace of John Greenleaf Whittier.

        Invariably, my father would turn to me and say, "You may be pretty smart, but the man that lived there was wittier."

       He was a poet.  Here is a hymn made from Whittier's poem, "The Brewing of Soma."

Good Shepherd to the World

 If you had ever asked me what role papal diplomacy plays in international politics, I would have said, "none."  I never gave it a thought.  However, thinking about it, I would still respond with "none."  Why would a political entity pay attention to a religious entity?  

Out of respect, a political entity might listen, or pretend to listen, but what affect would religion have on a political situation?  Both Pope Francis, and now, Leo XIV, have urged peace in the war-torn countries of Ukraine and Gaza.  Their pleas are ignored. So what use is papal diplomacy?

After reading The Cross and the Flag by Father John Tanyi Nouah Lebui, I am reconsidering my opinion. Father John Tanyi is my parish priest.  He wrote The Cross and the Flag. He has taught in universities and is a scholar of international relations and diplomacy.

The first reason to reconsider is that the Catholic religion is the world's largest religion.  Many if not most countries have Catholics in them.  They pay attention to their pope.  Church teachings affect their followers, and their followers vote and act in other ways that affect their actions. 

Think of the example of Poland in 1970's food riots, the overthrowing of their government, and the Solidarity movement.  Think of the anti-abortion movement in the USA.  

But not all countries have a majority of Catholics.  Still.  The papacy is an important moral voice.  The pope has spoken to the UN.  Encyclicals are read and studied.  Even if a political entity doesn't follow papal teachings, it would hear and feel international criticism.  In today's globalized and internet news alerted world, opinions matter.  What sets what the pope says apart, is the fact, that it has no agenda, outside of what's best for humanity.  The pope is a moral voice--a conscience.

Now if you asked me what role papal diplomacy plays in international politics, I'd say that it plays a necessary and important part.  In fact, if you want to know what was going on in any country, anywhere, forget asking that countries' politicians.  Ask the parish priests.  The priests know their people.  Their bishops know their priests.  And their pope knows both.  A shepherd knows his sheep and the sheep know their shepherd.  

Who Do You Think You Are?

 Do you have any idea how insulting this question is?  "Who do you think you are?"  

It assumes that you were presuming to be someone you have no right to be.  

Maybe you wrote something and were just expressing your opinion?  Maybe you were trying to help?  

"Just who do you think you are?"

This is a good example of "Who do you think you are?"  Kneeling is Father Ernesto Cardenal. Pope John Paul II is scolding Cardenal for his political actions.  Cardenal was a cabinet minister.  JPII took away Cardenal's faculties as a priest.  He also took away the faculties of other priests, who were in the government.  These priests felt they were acting as Jesus would by caring for the people.  The pope disagreed.  

      Before Ernesto Cardenal died, his priestly faculties were reinstated and   Cardenal was able to celebrate Mass, once again.

This picture is taken from America magazine, 1983.

The Poet That was Almost Pope

 He was a contender.  His name was mentioned as papabile.  I am talking about Cardinal Tolentino de Mendonca, from Portugal.  He is a poet and writes under the name of Jose Tolentino Mendonca.  He is a priest.  Here is one of his poems.

Eschatology

And, at last, God returns
full of intimacy and unexpectedness
contemplated already from centuries above
humble measure of a verbal silence
we thought destined to be lost

See God climbing the steep path
that we have paced a thousand times
and stop to wait without impatience
meek as a sick lamb

Which one of us is the other’s shadow?
Even if no pity preserves the maps
we’ll come down close behind
rampant and empty
like a tree trunk

© Translated by Ana Hudson, 2012

Tune In

Sunday, I attempted to explain that prayer was like tuning an instrument to get a pleasant sound.  We try to tune our wills to God's Will.  This morning, I read about Moses coming across the burning bush. Here God calls Moses.  He gives Moses a mission.  And only after a long debate does Moses tune his will to that of God's.

I call this prayer.  He is communicating with God.  

 

Tuning

 Today, my "cloistered brothers" were discussing prayer.  What does praying mean to you?  I thought the best answer was a comparison.  Praying is like tuning an instrument.  The instrument is trying to find the correct pitch.  Praying is trying to tune your heart to God. 

Violins Prayers is sensitive instruments communication which relies on the tension of their strings attention to stay in tune focus. It does not take much for this tension to slacken or tighten, such as temperature conditions, or simply through regular, day to day usage routine. Tuning the violin heart is a delicate operation and can be a daunting process if you are unfamiliar with it. If the open strings (G, D, A & E) are your focus is out of tune, this can affect the tuning of the whole instrument prayer and subtly shift the placement of your attention. However, there are lots of different tips and tricks you can use to ensure your prayer life is perfectly in tune and will blend seamlessly with what you want to say from your heart.  

Some people begin by sitting in front of a visual aid, i.e., if you are praying for the health of a loved one.  Look at a picture of your loved one for inspiration.

You might want quiet.

Music sometimes can help.

Rote prayers to get one going, like the Lord's Prayer.

Reading some psalms.

Talk to God like you talk to your best friend.

How do you tune your prayers?