Friday, November 30, 2012

Really Look at that Gift Horse


The other day I was given a little spiritual direction, that I am still bummed about.  My temperament is such that I'm not bothered by much.  It just rolls off me.  Why?  I dunno.

Maybe I'm just lazy.

Maybe I'm selfish and not worried about anything that doesn't affect me.

Maybe I'm such a people pleaser that I don't want anyone mad at me.

heh.

Hey, maybe I just trust God to handle everything.

I never thought much about why I'm like this, except to consider it a blessing.  I always considered it a gift.  I thought it was a gift from God.

Whenever I read or hear about "forgiveness," I feel my eyes glaze over.  I have no one to forgive.  No one has ever done anything to me that I've taken offense to.  I may think that something someone said was stupid, but I wasn't hurt.  I have ranted and raved, but I can't remember why, of for what reason. Isn't this a grace?

It turns out that I'm fooling myself.  It would be a wonderful grace to hate someone, and then forgive them, and love them.  Forgiving is something I've never been given the grace to do because my personality is such that I'm not offended so easily.

                 No offense = Nothing to Forgive       Offended+Forgiveness= Blessings

I just thought of something.
Before I was a little self-righteous: I love everybody; never met a person I didn't like.  OK, maybe I was a little too proud of what was just my temperament.

But!  Now I forgive myself.  ;-D